BEHIND THE HORROR
The True Terror of
Theme Park Halloweens
by
Rootie Simms
First
American publication rights
copyright
©2015
Can you stay in a
room filled with hundreds of giant hissing cockroaches? Would you
enjoy lying in a glass coffin while dozens of live rats crawled on
you? Do you have screws surgically implanted in your head to support
metal spikes? If you have any of these or similar qualifications,
there’s a job for you at one of the country’s largest Halloween
events.
As
a writer who likes to pick up odd jobs (literally) I’ve worked for
some of the biggest Halloween celebrations in Florida. Okay, maybe I
don’t work with cockroaches and rats or wear spikes in my head, but
I once held a much more terrifying job—entertainment coordinator.
Several
years ago I worked for the largest Halloween event in the country. I
can’t name the theme park because I had to sign a nondisclosure
agreement, and while it seemed odd at the time, after spending 28
nights immersed in complete madness, I quickly came to understand the
need for protection. Oddly enough, it wasn’t the guests who needed
protection from the park, it was the park who needed protection from
the guests.
As
an entertainment coordinator I was in charge of an area filled with
bikers-of-the-damned which included chainsaw-wielding bikers,
dancing biker chicks in cages and an assortment of bloody ghouls
whose job was to terrorize people as they walked through the area.
All of the actors were in makeup and costumes to make them look like
a dead gang of bikers who’d just escaped from hell. A very
professional and scary looking bunch!
My
job description stated that I was to keep the actors on schedule,
monitor their performances, keep morale high, and attend to emergency
situations. I assumed this meant simple things like costume
malfunctions or actors breaking character. I would soon learn that it
wasn’t the actors I had to worry about, it was the guests.
My
first clue came on opening night as I walked backstage to get to my
area. Along the way I discovered a new section under construction. It
was odd—rows of metal chairs being set up, several large desks, a
photo booth with lights and cameras, and several big vans with police
logos on the side. It was strange because the setup was in an area
off-limits to the public.
I
stopped a veteran manager and pointed to the setup. “What’s
that?”
He
looked up from his clipboard. “It’s a booking station.”
“What’s
the theme? Arresting zombies or demons?”
“Nope.
Guests. The police arrest anywhere from 50 to 100 a night during
Halloween nights and it’s more convenient to book them here at the
park than at the police station. After they’re booked, they’re
loaded into paddy wagons and hauled to jail.”
“Seriously?”
“You’ll
see.”
“What’re
they arrested for?”
“Mostly
drunk and disorderly.”
“I
know a lot of our guests get drunk, but what constitutes disorderly?”
“You’ll
see.”